A few months ago, my kids were looking for something to watch for movie night and we saw “Mickey and the Beanstalk” on Netflix, which I remembered from my childhood. In that area, “The Brave Little Tailor,” a Mickey Mouse short film showed up. I didn’t remember it clearly, but I knew it was a show I had watched as a kid. As the short went on, something distinct stood out to me—smoking was going to play a prominent role. I didn’t remember exactly what would happen, but I knew that someone was about to roll a fat one. Within minutes, Mickey started chasing this giant, and then this happened:

Can you imagine this being released today as a Disney Pixar cute little short before the movie? How times have changed!

I was reminded of this again when WV got to bring his school’s Curious George stuffed animal home. The students are sent home with a stuffed animal of Curious George, as well as a few of his books. We decided to get right to reading, and the original Curious George book was included. I had never read it, so I was excited to give it a go. I was slightly scandalized by the background of everyone’s favorite monkey.

It wasn’t the part where he jumped off the boat and projectile vomited water and fish when he was saved:

George Saved

And it wasn’t even the part where he sat down to enjoy a nice pipe:

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No, it was the beginning of the story. It all kicks off with the Man with the Yellow Hat visiting Africa. He sees George and decides he wants to take him home to sell to a zoo. So he does:

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So let’s get this straight. Not only is the Man With The Yellow Hat a poacher, but his hat plays an integral part as a weapon?

Occasionally reading kids books, I write a different ending in my head. Kids’ books are so sweet, and the best ones teach a great lesson. In my head, though, I want something that will stick a little better in my little one’s complicated brains. Let’s give them something to really drive home morals and consequences. Here’s how I’d rewrite this Curious George. After the above pictured page (about page 5 in the book), I’d just end it with this:

But then the Man with the Yellow Hat was caught capturing animals in the wild and putting them into captivity for a profit. He was sent to jail and had to stare at a dirty cement wall the rest of his life. George was released back into the wild and was free to get up to all his crazy, stupid, don’t-try-this-at-home antics as a free monkey. The end.

Curious George Prison

There, that’s better. Don’t you think?

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