My son is a genius. Like every mom, I have unlimited reasons to believe this, but listen to me here. I have real, genuine proof that anyone in the country would agree with. I know for certain, because I asked my mom, and she agreed whole-heartedly that we must enroll her first grandchild—stat—in the best program around. Enough said.

Here’s some of my proof. I was checking my email while Wally ate breakfast (our M-F morning routine). He was looking over my shoulder, saying his usual account of what is happening right now, in case anyone in the room (me and him) is wondering: “Mommy working. Mommy check emails. Waddy eating.” (This is his name for himself. I am convinced that all kids who can’t pronounce certain letters have that letter in their name. My mom was cursed with S’s growing up, so she was “Janith.” I knew a very nice kid in high school named “Wyan.” So Waddy substitutes “D”s for “L”s.)

Then he said, “Waddy shopping!” I looked to see how he could possibly be shopping, since this did not seem as accurate as his usual assessment of the present. And he was pointing to my computer screen. Then he said, “Girrafe store!” I looked, and yes, a Toys R Us email was on my screen, and my little genius had spotted the logo.

Then yesterday we were driving around, and Wally said, “Waddy go there!” “Where?” I asked. “Target!” Keep in mind, this is a kid who has only a few hundred words in his vocabulary, most of which he mashes together, brutalizing common vocabulary most of the time to make logical sense—toddler speak. You know, saying things like, “Mommy, wake up!” I sit up, and then he says, “Now wake down!” (wanting me to lay back down). But “Target” was perfectly clear, and accurate.

I’m sure you agree with me by now: genius. Wally 4 says it is either that, or I shop too much. The graphic designer in him is proud, by the way, that his two year old can accurately identify logos. And before you judge my shopping habits, he also recognizes church, Daddy’s office, and the library when we drive by, shouting them out like they are a new discovery. The other day pulling into library class, Wally yelled out, “Library! Daddy found it!” As if we had been driving around aimlessly hoping to come upon it.

Also keep in mind that this is the same kid who was sure he spotted a finger in his dinner the other night. However, I am sticking with genius. As his mom, it’s my job.

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